LIfe is Made of Moments

Life is amazing right now. I am really maturing and starting to realize what is important. Marriage, kids, loving life, enduring the hard times, etc. The moments I am making right now are.... indescribable. I love Dill Pill.... what would I do without her? and ellice? they bless my life and they add to my moments, especially dill. They cal me moppy or nikki but they say nikki really operatic-like: nikkkiiiii. oh but their latest and greatest is cookie. yes my nickname is cookie, lol. nicknames are ellice's things for sure

Classic Delia Face


Ellice and Noelle


Under the lyrics is a video of my two girls. It's hilarious. I hope to actually hear this song one day and the n make a collage of pics of my girls with it playing.


Lyrics to “Made of Moments” by Adam Garza


When I wake up, and the sun is shinin' on my faceA brand new day calls my name
I've got to find my keys and start on my way, hey

So many things can happen in one day
Maybe today, she'll say, she wants to marry me
So many things can happen in one year
Oh did ya hear, that song, what's on the news
Yea, my brother's coming home soon
Life is made of moments, a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time
If life is worth living, life is worth recording
So I got to thinkin’ if today my life should pass away
How much of me will have remained
Should I have taken one small moment each day
To etch in gold my life for always, so I wont fade
Life is made of moments a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time, this time
Life is sharing moments, of all these years I hope to keep this one in mind
I wanna remember, I wanna remember
The late night camping scene when all were fast asleep
My first new set of wheels, I tried so hard not to speed
It meant so much to me what grandpa said to me
The night before he walked into the light
The day I saw the eyes of my love dressed in white
The sound of life, the sound of my son’s first cry
Life keeps rolling on, with memories forever gone
And I just want to hold on, hold on
Oh yea hold on, hold on
If life is worth living, life is worth recording, now

The Return..... -of a friend and -of school

Kelia returns!!!! Kelia has been on a mission to Argentina since October 2007. That is so weird cuz that is when I was a nanny. Which doesn't seem that long ago but it feels like Kelia has been gone for such a long time. She didn't seem too different, maybe a little more mellow, but then again she had just been on a 15 hour flight. She was happy to be home but missed Argentina very much. Her mom was there snapping pics like crazy! which reminds me I need to get those pictures from her. She has some of me and Kelia actually posing, which I don't. This is all I have: Me giving her balloons and hugging her.



But I do have a picture of her and her mom:)



Now that's the Kelia I know!!!



I can't wait to "get to know her" again. She can help me with my Spanish:) Although I am getting a bachelor of arts in Therapeutic Recreation or Adventure and Outdoor Programs. That means I get to take a language. So last week I went to sign up for classes and realized I was required to see an advisor and then attend orientation before doing registering. SO i met with Becky and learned what classes would be best to take first (I was right on the money). Next week I will attend orientation and then I'll be set! I am so excited to go to school. Although by the time that rolls around winter will be going and that is no bueno;/ But for now I will prepare for school and enjoy summer:D

Changes

So I have a new job.... I work at Westridge Academy (formerly known as Utah Boys Ranch). I work on the girls side. It has been around only 3 or 4 years tops, whereas the boys has been around for almost 40 years! It is the perfect job. I am a livein counselor. I have my own apartment attached to the home. There are three homes on girls side. Boys side has eight homes. Not all the homes are open with kids in them though. Our numbers are down right now. It is a great job. I wake up the girls at 6:30am and I leave them after breakfast at 8am. SO in the fall I can go to school right after. Then I just get to be back to work at 6pm till 10pm. It has its ups and downs but it is great. My bosses (Jeff and Jay) have told me recently that they prayed strongly over the decision of who to hire and they felt very impressed to hire me. I hope I can live up to their expectations.

Some weeks are good some are rough. Some days are amazing and some days I just want to curl up and go back to bed. But truly, isn't every job that way? At least I am helping girls get on the right track. *cross your fingers* I love these girls. They are all so unique and really bring something to this campus. Even the ones who drive me nuts a majority of the time. Anywho, we had a Gala fundraiser in the month of April. The girls and boys dressed up in vests, bow ties, white shirts and black pants to be servers to the guests. I got to help supervise. I wasn't able to get a picture of the girls. They all changed before I could. They all hated how they looked, lol. They were all super professional and did an amazing job! I felt so proud. Especially of H.

Here are some pics of the girls. One is of StS and me. She is shorter than me so she asked me to squat down. And she is even on her toes haha.





I love the boys. They are all my little brothers. Any chance I get to work on the boys side is a treat, well, kinda. They aren't perfect for sure, but they are straight up usually. It's a bigger campus too so there seems to be a lot going on. Dave and Justin (2 live-ins on boys side that I hang with. First is H home, latter is J home) had a water fight between their homes. I wish I could've been there. Although I have already been soaked by a staff over there and he will receive his dues. All the staff are like brothers too. So back to the Gala, lol, there are pics of some of the boys too.





For the Gala I volunteered to create the display to represent the homes. Linda Stone (Pond Parent) and Dave (H live-in) helped me out. Here's the pics of it. Jeff and Jay were super impressed by it. Jeff took us out to lunch as a reward. I like Jeff, he's a good guy. Very friendly and fun to joke with. He has it together. He is over boys and girls campuses but is foremost a therapist. Jay is Night security supervisor and over girls side. I wish I had pics of them :P








I know this is where I need to be right now. Even though my wanderlust eye is always scanning the horizon for new paths, I will stay here for at least a year, hopefully more. Not long enough to get stuck in Utah but long enough to graduate from the U-??? and also to create some stability in Sage home. and the campus. I replaced a live-in 3 months ago today (well yesterday now, haha). Then our Sage home live-out (Crystal) left a week ago and Pond live-in (Mandy) had her last day yesterday. Kim, new Sage home live-out, is not new to the campus, just new to the position. She has been here 3 years and held all sorts of positions. Our new live-in, Megan, worked in a another stricter program. She has worked two days only so far, but seems great. So there are just a lot of changes right now. I better be careful not to get burnt out by working so much (my normal position plus night security, boys side, and rec trips). I want to go on rec trips though because my major is rec therapy. In fact I have pics of the a camping trip that was 3 or 4 days long. I was only there for the last day and a half. I will get pics up asap. Well that's all for now folks. Ya happy Christina????!!!! :PPP

About Dang Time!!

So I have been so busy since my last post. I went to Europe for a couple months and had a blast (except when I had my purse stolen- don't ask) I bought a new snowboard and gear and am so excited to use them all winter. I am currently working at Gold Gym, attending institute and helping my cool friend Christina with her wild kiddos. Here are some cute pics from years ago, Enjoy the laughs:

Time Capsule

I just received an email from myself that I wrote a year ago today. I wrote it at http://www.bored.com/emailcapsules/
It was great to read what I was thinking back then. I am going to include it in this post with my next "time capsule."

Dear Future Version of Me,
this is kind of cool. Let's hope i have this email long anough to get this. I probably will, it's gmail. So...life is pretty exciting right now. I am probably moving to LA to nanny for a year at least. It will help me save up money for my volunteer trip to an orphanage in south america or africa. And money for my trip to france or italy (study abroad) and ILP (teach english in china or russia- like Caidy). I know, I have a lot of goals. These will all lead me to the peace corps. I'm not sure where school fits in but the peace corps helps pay for school when i'm done so maybe I'll do that when I'm married. I am getting married:) lol. I'd like to work at zion ponderosa resort, for the recreation and because the GM, Michael Caine, is so freakin nice, but the nanny position is better in the long run (for one, it pays SO much better). Life is good right now. I just lived with Cathy Larson for two months while Caidy is in China and i finish up my second semester at UVSC. What a blessing that was! to live in such a peaceful welcoming home. My relationship is pretty good with my mom and dad, in fact my dad and i are going to see Night at the Museum tonight at movies 8. i'm glad cuz i want to see him before i go. My relationship with my dad is really good right now. I've learned to let things go and accfept him for who he is. I just can't be around him to much i think is how it works. I get to see jordana this weekend when the nanny family flies me out to LA to "check out things." I am so excited!! Jo and i had a really good talk on friday and tara isn't speaking to me cuz i offended her over the whole Shawn ordeal. I didn't get why she wasn't answering my calls but then jo told me. Tara can be so....nevermind. i love her when we are talking and that's all that matters. that's my life and those are my plans. we'll see whether my plans match the lord's plans for me. can't wait!!
Written at Tue Apr 24, 2007



The new time capsule (i hope I don't read it before then since it is now a post):

Dear Future Version of Me,
So my plans have changed a bit. the peace corps still sounds good especially since watching Oprah's Big Give. I really need to start making a difference, not matter how it looks (be it time, money, or love). But for now the peace corps aren't quite inside the scope. I am going to Cal Poly Pomona next year (2009-2010) after I go somewhere else to achieve the credits to reach me to 60 credits (required for transfer students at cal poly). I'm thinking Snata Monica College, UCLA extension, or Chaiffey college depending on where I live. I have an amazing offer to work at Wagon Wheel when I get back but that requires longer than a year commitment I think. If I am in LA this coming year I won't stay longer than a year because i'll need to live out by Jo to go to Cal Poly. {I need to go there because my degree is commercial recreation. UofU offers the best program but I don't want to be in Utah}. Ai!! What do I do?! I have my whole life ahead of me and so much I want to do. I love it but I need to focus on the present and stop thinking about the future as if it is m present. Life is amazing. I love that I chose this time to live on Earth or that God chose it for me.

I have gained all my weight back but i feel like a completely different person i think in some ways I accept myself more for who I am at this weight. but in some ways I don't because I know I can control the crazy eating and can get back to a more comfortable state of mind and body. I am a child of God but i have lost sight of that in the past few months because I haven't been to church in that long. I am heading to europe where I will still go to church throughout the traveling (thanks to my traveling partners, kara and tanner). I am learning to love myself over and over again it seems. I know I want a husband, but I know I could really make it alone. I am grateful for my friends. I am grateful for the love that I have received from everyone in my life. I am grateful for a higher knowledge.

As far as the country goes. I don't think the war will be over in a year. I think Hillary clinton will win, but it will be extremely close between her and McCain. I want to vote for her but most independents (who i agree with) are voting for McCain. Pres. Hinckley and Pres. Faust died within 6 months of each other and now Pres Monson is the prophet and I hope nothing happens to him. He will make an excellent prophet. I need to know more about what is going on in the world if i am to make a difference there are so many diseases out there that I don't know about that i need to learn of (like the one in extreme home makeover where the brain sinks into the brain stem). I want to be more informed in a year. More active and more giving.I hope to be settled enough to sit down and get a degree, but not enough that I lose my desire to travel and experience new things. whew! that is enough.

6 minutes 44 seconds

What is a 6 minute 44 second conversation? It depends on who you talk to in that moment....is it life-changing or just mood-altering? That all depends on you.

I had that conversation tonight.

I wouldn't say it changed my life, maybe not immediately, but it did change my perspective on friends. For once I realize that true friends exist. ones who really care. Ones who have a pile of homework but take the time to read your dumb blog you just updated after three months of silence.......and then call you back to talk about it. They then share their beliefs and testimony and hang up immediately and oddly enough you don't feel short changed. You feel lucky for those 6 minutes and 44 seconds they took to make sure you were ok. They planted a seed hoping it will take root. The seed was love, faith, a strong self esteem, confidence, and determination to stand up for who you really are.

What does it take to be a friend? those small moments.........of sacrifice........and of sharing.



Now it is up to me to live up to what my friend sees in me......

it has been so freakin long

yea, that title says it all. and the fact that it is one in the morning says a lot. I don't have much to say (because I have to be up in fiev hours) but tanner keeps buggin me about updating. I really should write on here more. it is very......oh what's the word...this is really understating it, but helpful. It gets out my emotions and decisions-in-the-making. So to really update ya'll on that here is an email to my best friend on a church mission in argentina:


Hermana Hyer-

I love being able to type that. You don't realize how proud I am of you Kelia! You are the best example out of all my friends. You are beautiful, confident, determined, and courageous. you are intelligent and faithful and very spiritual. Everyday you look in the mirror please realize that. If anyone asks me who my role model is, it is my best friend Kelia. You are always there for me, but because of my insecurities and wavering faith, I worry that you won't always be by my side (kind of like now). Because people want to surround themselves with those of the same standards and beliefs, and to surround themselves with those who lift them up. I always seem to be the friend who is falling by the wayside, and right now I am extremely worried about myself (gosh this sounds so selfish). My spirituality is wavering. I find myself walking that fine line, or at least thinking about walking it. I want to stay in LA and be with my sister, Jordana, who I love SO much, but she holds none of the standards I should hold. But I find myself relating very well with her. she and her friends are people I feel so comfortable with. Jordana's boyfriend, his family, and all his friends make me feel more like I have a family than I have ever felt before. So I want to stick around LA because it is fun and thriving and internationally cultured (is that even a word/phrase?)and has my sister nearby. But I find myself slipping, questioning how important this is.....the church. Like...will I really go to hell, or some lower degree for just this...or this ....or this? I have two really good girlfriends out here. One has the complete opposite schedule of mine and is strong in the church. But the other who I can get together with at least once a week outside of church bends the rules constantly: a little coffee here, a little swearing there (not in front of me though). I miss a lot of sundays visiting my sister or working. The point is, I coming to the line and seriously wondering will it really make a difference whether I do some fo these little things? won't the lord understand and forgive me despite my complete consciousness of it all? So here I am, 12:30 am wondering where I belong when my year is up in april and after I come back from europe in july. Do I head back to utah to regain my spirituality, or do I suck it up and fight for it here or...... just give in? I read your wonderful email and wonder if I should be out there,in the mission field, but not necessarily to spread the gospel but to strengthen myself? that is so selfish and not the right reason to go at all.

I want to head down the right path but I want to be free to do as I please without feeling guilty. I have the opportunity to be a nanny again (after europe) in a much better experience. It is more flexible, right off the beach in Santa monica. I can go to SM college during the day. The family is a single mom with a 6year old girl and 10 year old boy. They are active Latter day saints and that is why they want me. But do I want to be a nanny again? I want to be single and have roommates and just have fun. But here i can save up money and live on the freakin beach. So nanny or single? and if single...live with my sister or find an apartment or go back to utah?! it seems like once or twice a year when I have to make a big decision this happens (not the part about me losing faith, but struggling to know where to go).

Oh kelia, I know this is not what you need right now, you need uplifting letters to help you stay upbeat and spread the gospel. It seems like I have had this conversation with you many times before. Oh kelia......when will I stop doubting?! when will i gain as much faith as you to always choose the right or at least never feel tempted by stupid things?! I want to turn to the Lord but I don't pray to him on a regular basis so I feel like am using Him. And i know the answer to that: it is satan telling you not to pray....when you don't feel like praying is when you need to pray the most. I feel like my spirit is dying and almost like I don't care...but I know I do because I am bawling my eyes out right now. what drives you kelia? what gives you that unwavering faith? what.....what is it?! that makes you who you are? I am not writing to get a sympathy letter (if anything a kick me in the butt reply), I meant to write you because that is what good friends do when the other is on mission.

I love that you are having a great time. I love that you send pictures and that you are so involved and inspired. I can and I can't believe President Hinckley died! I guess because of that I am feeling more self conscious spiritually as well. I didn't even get to watch the funeral because I was working. I plan to watch it on BYUtv.org or something like that. Kelia you are amazing. keep up the great work. You are someone to behold. when I do pray, i pray for you. keep being an amazing example and know that if you need anything(!) you let me know...please! I have some extra money now so don't hesitate. I love you so much and keep writing those letters your mom forwards around:)

Love Cole

p.s. my next letter will be much more uplifting! :P